Religion and Happiness

October 2023

Every so often I hear of a new survey that clearly indicates that religious people (that is, people who actually practice a religion) are happier than non-religious people. I am skeptical of any survey that relies on self-reporting, but it seems that no matter how the survey is conducted, the results are remarkably consistent over the years. And, even if the survey was something simplistic, like "rate your happiness on a scale from 1 to 10", at least the respondents THINK they are happy. And here's the kicker: the results were consistent across all religions. In other words, it didn't matter what religion you follow - happiness seems to go along with any spiritual faith. I haven't looked at the most recent survey that prompted me to write this, but I don't think there were enough respondents of fringe groups or cults to draw any conclusions about them - we are talking about major world religions.

Honestly, this surprised me at first. I wouldn't have thought that Muslims were as happy as Hindus, which were as happy as Christians. But once I thought about it, it made sense to me. What is the main difference between religious and non-religious people? Religious people are focused outward towards something greater than humanity and nature, a God (or gods), whereas non-religious people feel no need to look for something "beyond". In fact, what do we hear from (some) counselors and psychologists? Those who are most focused on themselves are the least happy among us. So religion of any kind helps us to be less self-absorbed. Further, a major component of all religions is that there is a future after death that is determined by how we behave in this life. Whether it is being reincarnated as something better or being allowed into heaven, the idea of being rewarded for good behavior (and punished for bad behavior) has a material effect on how people behave. Besides getting our eyes off of ourselves, this also encourages us to do things that make us feel better for other reasons. There is satisfaction in being generous, helping people, and generally not being selfish. How many times have we done something selfish and suffered either the natural consequences of that selfishness or just the self-recrimination that comes upon reflection of those actions? Therefore, it is natural that the less selfish we are, the more happy we are, generally speaking.

Now if my life goal was to be happy above all else, I suppose I would follow whatever religion most suited my tastes. But, as much as I like to be happy and want others to be happy, if my goal is to be happy then I've short-circuited the whole benefit of religion which is to get my eyes off of myself. In other words, happiness is a byproduct and not the end goal.

Some years ago I did an informal survey to ask how people define "evil". This was a question that I had wrestled with for many years - redefining and refining it over time. I could have easily given a Biblical definition, but I was looking for a way to define the term in a way that would make sense to everybody. The majority response to my survey was to define evil in terms of what was socially unacceptable. Even when I asked some clarifying questions, I didn't really seem to get anything deeper. I don't say this as a criticism - it was somewhat unfair to spring such a question on people and expect a reasoned response immediately to a question that I had grappled with for years. Some people did respond with insight. Whether they had already wrestled with the question for a while or are simply quicker minds than mine (probably the latter), they reached the same conclusion that I had reached. We define evil as selfishness.

Understand that I'm not saying that selfishness results in evil. Rather, it is evil. The selfishness inside us will eventually express itself in our words and actions, and these are evil acts. But the acts are simply the natural outcome of the selfishness (evil) inside. Who cheats or steals or murders that does not do so because they selfishly put their own desires above the welfare of others? Evil acts are not committed except to consummate the selfishness within. Granted, not everyone cheats or steals or murders. Maybe you do more socially-acceptable evils like gossip or slander. Laws, proper upbringing, and the wisdom of avoiding natural consequences are all restraints on how we act out our inner selfishness. But I've yet to meet a single human that did not act selfishly to one degree or another. Myself included. This is why Jesus actually equated hatred with murder. You don't murder someone unless you've put yourself above their life, which is the antithesis of loving them. He gives some other examples as well to point out that it is what is inside that is important. "For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies". Now Jesus wasn't the first or last to say something along these lines, yet few people seem to recognize this truth.

To be clear, selfishness is exalting myself above others. And if you believe in a Supreme Being, it is also exalting myself over Him. Religion acts as an anchor on selfishness, which not only makes people behave better but also results in a more prosperous and peaceful society overall. But one problem with this is that while it makes you act better, it doesn't make you better. I'm not knocking the benefits of religion, but we must face the fact that all that a religion does is refocus our selfishness in another direction. In extreme cases, it may result in terrorism ("I'm going to kill myself along with others so that I get 72 virgins in the afterlife"), or a bunch of hateful people protesting at the funeral of a gay man so they can feel self-righteous. At best, religion offers a set of rules to live by, or practices to follow, which result in us behaving less selfishly than we would otherwise. It is hardly the ultimate solution because even with religion, there is plenty of evil in our society. But as Benjamin Franklin once observed, "If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be if without it?".

Now I've met a few people that insist that they don't need religion to behave decently. But I don't believe them. Either they do have some belief in a judgment day of some sort or they do not, in fact, live an unselfish lifestyle. Logically, why would they? If this life is all there is, then why wouldn't you take every advantage (at least legally) to promote your own interests? In fact, if this life is it, then it would be stupid not to do so. This calculus is done mostly at a subconscious level, but it is done nonetheless. So, what society would you rather live in: an atheistic one or a religious one? All other things remaining equal I would choose the religious culture.

This is quite a statement from me, because I despise religion. As an ex-religious person, like an ex-smoker, I have a bit of a crusader's attitude towards religion. I was very religious when I was a teenager. But my whole focus was on dos and don'ts. We call that "legalism". That defined Christianity, as my religion of choice, to my mind. And it is how I represented it to others. But that just made me what St. Paul calls a "false brother". At age 19, I met Jesus and I've shed all that religious garbage over the years since. God was gracious to me because I spoke out of ignorance. But I also found something important that was missing from my Christian religion (and all religions): power. Despite being religious, I was not a good person. Religion has its limits on restraining our selfishness because it is based on our own ability to resist our selfish desires. Some of us are stronger than others, but eventually even the strongest of us succumbs. But Jesus, and only Jesus, provides power to overcome the evil within. I am still far from perfect, but there was a night and day difference in me on that November day when I was 19. Overnight I was able to overcome selfishness that I had been a slave to for years and had fought unsuccessfully in my own strength. That old evil will still be in my heart until the day I die, but it steadily has less and less influence on my actions. I found freedom by leaving religion behind and following Jesus, because His power is changing my heart. And a less selfish heart will result in less evil actions. And less selfish actions results in less regret, which I suppose makes me happier.